Scrap That Scrap

Over the last year I have gradually evolved from being an extremely reluctant and somewhat nonplussed semi-computer literate who was quick to dismiss the invitations to join this blessed thing called 'orkut' sent by many relatively more social and computer savvy acquaintances to a rather frequent 'orkutter'. If you cant beat 'em, join 'em, I figured.

What is really amazing about orkut (and the like - I believe there are other similar services that I have not yet subscribed to) is how people get hooked to it and how it offers complete strangers a window into our as yet very personal lives - which, oddly enough, nobody really seems to mind. Orkut is like a telescope you put in your window and pretend not to peep into other peoples homes. 'Orkuting' and 'Orkuter' are words that have become commonplace and I suspect might find their way into the Oxford lexicon at this rate. Another semi-medical term I propose is ' Orkutitis' - A condition that may result as an overuse of one's orkut account.

The diagnostic criteria I propose for severe Orkutitis are as follows:
(2 Major or 1 Major and 2 Minor criteria are required to establish a diagnosis)

Major Criteria
1. If you have over 2000 scraps in your scrapbook(chronic orkutitis) or receive/send/exchange over 20 scraps a day (acute orkutitis)

2. If you have over 10 photos in your album in all OR
If you have less than 10 photos but one of them is of a baby(yours as a baby, your baby, your niece/nephew, random baby pic - the prognosis gets worse in that order)

3. If you have greater than 2 video links on your account

4. If you change your profile name with every changing phase in your life (exams coming, exams over, getting admission, getting a job, getting married etc etc)

5. If the last meaningful conversation you had was in 'scraps'

6. If said conversation did not contain any vowels.

Minor Criteria
1. If you meet more people through orkut in a week than in real life.

2. If you check your scrapbook more than 4 times a day for new messages.

3. If you update the pictures in your album more than once in 2 months.

4. If you belong to greater than 25 communities.

5. If you have over 200 friends on orkut.

6. If you have mastered the art of typing alternate letters in CaPiTaLs

I'm still working on a possible management regimen of severe orkutitis. As of now I can only recommend controlled exposure. Prevention is better than finding there's no cure. For more developments, watch this space.